Salamzzzz.

I haven't updated in soooooo long! So many things have happened since. I've moved out, got a job yadda yadda, all that is good, except I have no more internet. That has to wait till I get my owwwn place. Right now i'm back in my lovely mothers house for vacation, so I decided to get back to my daily internet routine.

Anyways a bit about what's been happening. My  teaching job is lovely. I love those kids. Even though I have no qualifications or whatever she hired me based on my teaching experience. Alhamdulillah everything is going well..my boss is awesome my co-workers are awesomer and everything is just lovely.

I realised these days I don't have much time to think of sad depressing things. I'm with kids till two in the afternoon, then I come back to my aunts house (I stay with her for the meanwhile) and take care of her two adorable daughters. So basically I have to act almost like Barney. Its really annoying when I get time to sit down and think of it. But then who caaaaaares. I'm happy, the kids are happy, the aunt is happy because her kids are happy.

But not everything is perfect. Even though my pay is not as low as other teachers (it's an international school) It's still not enough to live in KL. I have to find a second job inshaAllah. Staying with my aunt now is a blessing. I pay  her boarding but not as much as how I would pay if i rented an apartment or something..money money money. When is someone going to invent the money tree?

But now anyways now that i'm home on vacation I don't want to think about any silly money problemos. I'll just lay back and go to weddings and celebrate Eid inshaAllah and enjoooooy! My aunt's making soto this eid. I. can't. Wait. Yum yum yum.

Oh yes btw I put on five pounds! hehehehehe.

Eid Mubarak everyone!

wassalam

I woke up to my aunt calling me on the phone asking me to talk some sense into her daughter. Like 5 days ago when I stayed at her house in KL, I braided the little one's hair. Not big ones, tiny corn rows, and apparently she thought they were just gorgeous. Malaysians have mostly straight hair, so they don't have to  know the art of braids. Me being half  Malay, half black, I have the hair that most people get when they're mixed with black and something else. Big, brown, long and extremely curly. My mother doesn't know what to do with my hair, and the most my father ever took interest in my hair was telling me to comb it. So I learnt how to braid it myself.

So, back to the story. My aunt called me this morning, saying please tell my daughter that you will braid her hair again when we balik kampung.  The girl hadn't combed her hair in five days. She didn't want her mother to touch her hair either because she said her mother can't braid her hair again as pretty as that! And her mother is now distressed and worried because her daughter is walking around with her hair looking like rope. I  ask her.." Acik..how does your daughter take her bath?"

" I don't know! She shampoos them! She washes her braids and won't let me comb it outttt! It looks so horrible....what have you done to my daughter!"

Me, "Let me talk to her.." And so the kiddo comes to the phone but won't talk.

Me:" Acik is she there?"

Acik: " Yes she is but she won't say anything because she knows you'll just tell her to let me take them out..."

What a child.

InshaAllah within a month or two I will be moving out of my father's house. At least before the end of this year. I am moving out, without any high school diploma, only a work expierence of 3 years, and teaching experience of 1. InshaAllah I have my english certificate, and i'm taking a daycare course.

At first I was so scared, all the jobs I looked up all required at least a high school diploma. Every single job with decent pay. I almost felt panicked at first. But then I told myself to calm down. This is not what my father taught me in my 19 years of living. So i looked back at the jobs, and thought again, do I really want these jobs? 8-5 jobs which I know I won't like. I've had three years experience doing almost all the office work for my grandfather, and I hated it. I hated it with a passion, and getting up to go to work each morning literally made me sick. Now when I look back, I can't denied i learnt alot, But never again do I want to be in that situation, where you're working for someone, doing all the work they don't want to do, waiting every week for your pay. Depending on people.

I believe I can make it out there even though I dont have any kind of degree. I will just have to work my butt off. I have to be smart with my money, smart with my time. I will have my goals set, and focus focus focus inshaAllah. For the first few months I will work with someone. But only for the experience so that I can work on my own later on God willing. I've lived on my father's money all my life. I believe now it's time to give him a break. Maybe I can send him some money instead? I think he'd like that.

The only thing I need now is courage.

hafsah.